I actually self host an instance of [Rocket.Chat](https://rocket.chat/). It's pretty easy to get up and going, especially if you're ok with running their official Snap installation. It provides a lot of the features of Discord out of the gate, with the exception of voice channels. It has all the things you'd need like user access control, fun things like custom emojis and sounds, and the ability to provide custom CSS and scripts that fit your needs. It has a fully functioning native mobile app that has really improved over the years and is now top tier in my opinion. The default settings allow you to utilize Rocket.Chat's official push servers and is configured to use [Jitsi Meet](https://meet.jit.si/) for channel video/audio calls, but you can also disable those features or point them to your own private push and Jitsit Meet instances. It even has a built in IRC bridge if you want to connect to an IRC server and forward messages. Rocket.Chat gets my endorsement for being pleasant for users, easy to administer, and privacy minded for people that are seeking that.

Take a look at [HexChat](https://hexchat.github.io/).

Why bother hosting a different service altogether? It's not as easy as it sounds because you have to deal with IRC bot spam and malicious users, too. Rizon would probably be best suited for a #ruqqus channel.