I usually ignore those emails. Thanks for the advance warning.

Ada, python and C#.

Ada is the high school crush that you miss and will likely never meet again. Everything seemed just so safe and right.

C# is the steady companion with you through thick and thin.

Python is the smart and attractive hottie with whom you'd love to road trip, but only get to talk to on smoke breaks.

Ruby is the party hookup..."don't let crazy stick its D in you" or "don't stick your D into crazy"

Java is like your uncle Benny. Let's say he's pretty good at working on cars. He's very handy, but it is just kind of exhausting when he is over the house and helping you change your oil.

C is a grandparent who is always right and a pain in the ass.

C++ is like a parent that is often right, pain in the ass and when they are wrong they are very wrong.